Derailed

Just another update with the fam-o-lee for all of you that could give two craps about me and just want to know about the other dipshits love reading about all my own shenanigans, but are equally interested in the other conductors of this so-called crazy train too.

Leslie, Les, Lester-B, Lester-B-Davis, Hoe, Mom

I've said it before, I'll say it again - this woman is nuts, but we love her! She's been bitchin' and moanin enduring severe pain in her knees and feet for quite some time, and after many visits to a variety of doctors, the conclusion has been drawn. She's got a bum knee, which means she will be the happy recipient of a *BRAND NEW ARTIFICIAL KNEE* Let's everyone take a moment and congratulate her on being such a big winner. She loves to win, but I think she'd be happy with winning that stock tank ONLY. Yeah, remember that story? Told you she was batty! So besides being all jacked up on some really good drugs, she does have some sincere concerns. She wonders how she's going to be able to take care of the zoo while she's in recovery, will she be recovered in time for wedding festivities on the beach, is she going to be strong enough to carry the baby around when it comes time for her to babysit, etc. All very legit concerns, but much like me, she's a worrier, so it has taken a toll on her health. Last Thursday night, she must have just really freaked herself out, because she thought she was having a heart attack. 2 am and the ambulance arrives at the house to wisk her away to the ER, with my dad following behind. After several tests, she was cleared of having a heart attack but they're not quite sure what exactly it was, but are leaning towards a panic/anxiety attack. Mind you, my very own mother is laying in the ER thinking she's dying, but nobody bothers to call us. I didn't know until the next day at 6:45pm, when Danette casually said something about it in passing. I was like "WHAT? MY MOM? HOSPITAL? WHAT? SAYS WHO? Hopefully things will start to slow down for our family soon. We've gotten so busy lately.


The sister just got back from a vacation to Hawaii. La La La La La Larry took her and she was celebrating the end of her first year of law school. Daddy is thinking about suggesting a 2 for 1 deal with my mom's surgeon. He'd like a 1/2 price cut on a new hip too. Other than that, he's fine - just being that same old Mike that we all love. Scott & Abby are eagerly awaiting their special time in Hilton Head and are residing with crackheads in McKinney. Not really, but the other day, Scott did catch his neighbor sneaking over with scissors to cut the beautiful flowers Abby just planted in her garden for her vase. Freakin weird, I tell ya. And me, well, I'm just me!

Till next time...