Short Stories of the Sick & Heinous

Take a good look at this picture. Memorize it. Remember this face.

This is the face of some little monster who has absolutely no respect for her elder auntie. I stayed to hang out with her all weekend long: to feed her; to rock her to sleep; to throw her in the air; to take her on walks; to bathe her; to stay up with her when she was throwing a fit; to watch Barney...and do you know how she repays me? She gets me sick, that's how. Poor baby was the saddest little thing this weekend as she experienced her first cold. I was the saddest big thing the past few days because I felt like crap!

*A.Maze.Ing. Recipe*
Yesterday I didn't have much energy to get creative with making something to eat for lunch. I had absolutely no desire to get out of bed to drive anywhere for fast food. What I was left with was a decision that took all of 10 minutes to make, while staring blanklessly into the pantry. Thank you Kraft for mac & cheese. It did take a little effort, but at least I could lay on the couch while the noodles were boiling. So my noodles finish and I'm ready to mix in the cheese powder, butter, pepper and milk.

(First, let's throw back to Sunday night. I was savoring the delicious taste of Oreos and milk. I poured too big of a glass of milk, and I didn't drink it all (or use it all for dunking,) so for some reason (and don't ask me why) I put the rest of the milk in the glass back in the fridge. For later??? I don't really know.)

Okay, back to making M&C. Head to the fridge to retrieve the butter and milk and guess what. The. Milk. Carton. Is. Empty. A four letter word escaped my mouth. What the crap was I to do? Then, I spotted my glass of milk from the night before, and took about another 10 minutes to debate this situation...

Oh come on...there wasn't THAT much Oreo debris floating in the milk. And what person doesn't enjoy macaroni and Oreos? It's not like I can really taste anything right now anyway... So there you have it, a newly created dish: Macaroni and Oreo Cheese.

Don't look at me like that. I was ill. I can't taste. I had to eat.

*Trash Can. Night Stand. What's the difference?*
You all know that disgusting scratchy throat you get and all you can feel is drainage in the back of your throat, that causes a very long, sleepless night? Well, pardon me - it's gross I know, but if you don't get rid of the drainage when you have the chance, it then goes down into your chest and it's just all downhill from there.

With being awake All. Night. Long. I was very conscious of what was happening in my sinus cavities, nose and throat, so I took action in getting up and 'getting rid of it' in the sink. Let me tell you how quickly that got real old! Solution: trash can perched on the night stand.

Now, I've been known to spoon a trash can in my bed before, but that is usually after having a long night of frivolous fun. Last night, I had no fun. It was all business. Nasty, nasty business. And usually when I make out with the trash can all night, I feel better in the morning. Could I be so lucky today?

*Serious Work Responsibilities*
It came as no surprise that I woke up this morning feeling like complete poop. And when I say woke up, I really just mean when I finally put the trash can down and got out of bed to turn off my alarm. Once again I debated taking another sick day and staying home again. (Is it me, or does this illness make me debate a lot...?) Running down the list of all the things I have to do today, I realized it would be best for me to head into the office. I really shouldn't put these very serious professional responsibilities off a second day in a row. Things on my to-do list...

1. Finish addressing Christmas cards.
2. Record addresses in Contacts folder.
3. Make shopping list for Target: (red votive candles, two more strands of Christmas lights, wrapping paper container, one more storage tub, the list goes on...)
4. Look through Sunday's newspaper ads and clip coupons.
5. Finish book.
6. Start new book.
7. Order a birthday present.
8. Pay bills.
9. Order pictures online.
10. Write pointless, boring blog.
11. Watch YouTube videos of my cousin's new baby.

Are these all things I could have done at home yesterday? Of course. Could I have stayed home again today and still gotten all this done? Of course. But no, I am a dedicated employee. I had to return to the office to be productive. Sometimes my job is so demanding!